Interesting Thoughts on Education

“The fact is that given the challenges we face, education doesn't need to be reformed -- it needs to be transformed. The key to this transformation is not to standardize education, but to personalize it, to build achievement on discovering the individual talents of each child, to put students in an environment where they want to learn and where they can naturally discover their true passions.” Ken Robinson

“Learning is not done to you, it is something you choose to do. We need students who can learn how to learn, who can discover how to push themselves and are generous enough and honest enough to engage with the outside world to make those dreams happen.” Seth Godin


1. Curiosity comes first
2. Embrace the mess
3. Practice reflection
"An educator is the cultivator of curiosity and inquiries" Ramsey Musallam

I didn't agree with all their points for instance I disagree with Mr. Godin's opinion that memorization isn't needed. I think it does in certain subjects. That being said, I was inspired and love their perspective in education.

Life with Two Boys

If you stop by to our home without notice most likely you will see these:

Max said the sofa was a big boat and he NEED to bring all his toys and book inside the boat

 
If you are lucky, you get to see dinosaur and tiger latching on a chair: 

My pretty handmade pillows often get tossed aside:

One day I was wondering where all the balls went then I took a peek at their playhouse. When I asked them why they didn't put the balls back at the bin Max answered, "But those are not balls mama. They are ice creams that we are selling inside our ice cream truck." *Note to self: always check the playhouse first when something is missing.

 

My boys are at the age that I can leave them to play at their own while I take a quick shower. One time when I was ready to step inside the bath room I felt my feet step on something: Wesley's work of art. I remember Max was doing the same thing when he was at Wes' age:

My two years old is into drawing lately:


He came to Chris one day saying, "Papa HELP, it stuck."

Thankfully, I read the book Wild Things: The Art of Nurturing Boys earlier this year {great book by the way}. Things like this no longer give me a headache. It still amazes me what boys, their creativity, and curiosity can do:

 

Life with two small boys is loud, messy, 

and fun

It takes a lot of patience, energy,
Warning: Don't do this at home:


and creativity:

They makes me laugh, cry, and pray more. Not to mentioned distracted and forgetful.
This morning, my sister in law called my husband. After he hang up the phone;
I asked him, "What's up, hon?"

Chris: "Oh nothing... she just wished happy birthday."

Me: "Oh... whose birthday?"

Chris: "Uhm..me."

Me: "O... that's right!"

Happy birthday my love!  I can't thank God enough for giving me such a loving, hardworking, God-fearing husband. Thank you for your love, sacrifice, and patience to us. We love you!

PS: If you read through a reader, you may need to go to our blog to see the videos

San Francisco by Bart

We live about one hour drive from San Francisco. Last month, we want to try different experience so we went to SF by train or BART. The boys were ecstatic, we were too because it's a new experience for all of us. =D  We parked our car at Fremont station then hopped on the train. I showed Max the BART system map then explained to him the stations that train has to stop over. He kept asking question, "Where are we now? Are we passing the tunnel yet? Why the train keep stopping and stopping?"

Finally after one hour or so:

I *heart* our almost 5 years old Maclaren Stroller. It is super durable, lightweight, and comfy for the kid. We bought this mainly for traveling and it has serve its purpose well and beyond:

We stopped at Powell Station then walked all the way to China Town

My almost 5 years old is not into smiling at the camera these days.



Usually during weekend this restaurant: Yuet Lee is jam-packed, but because we went there on Monday we got to choose our sit and enjoy our lunch peacefully:


The food was very good although it may not be in the healthy category ;)


Afterward, we bought some delicious egg tarts and buns from Golden Gate Bakery, rode bus back to the Union Square and hang out a little bit.

   
 We made it. Yay!!!

 
The Bart ticket cost: $11.30 per adult. Children under 5 ride free
SF Bus = $2 per adult for 2 hours
Parking = $1 per day
  The memory and experience = priceless

Loving Our Marriage Enough to Protect It

Most of the time I blog whatever I want to but from time to time God would put something in my heart and keep reminding me to write about it like The Ministry of Motherhood post and the one I am about to write below.

If someone would ask me What are my three favorite marriage books; my answer would be Hedges- Loving Your Marriage Enough to Protect It, Fit to be Tied or Marriage Takes More than Love, and  The act of Marriage. I know it's four. Sorry, I can't decide between Fit to be Tied or Marriage Takes More than Love. Among those four, I think Hedges are the most important.

I read this book when Chris and I were still in courtship. I remember sharing the lesson I learned with him over the phone because we were on a Long Distance Relationship {back then Skype had not been invented yet}. He told me how the book was like an answered prayer for him because at that time I had many good male friends and I didn't see anything wrong with it until I read the book. You may disagree with me that's okay. I just share what I learned and what works for us.

Chris and I just celebrated our 11th anniversary last week. Over the years, our heart break to see so many marriages break up even Christian marriages and the marriages of those in the ministry because of marital unfaithfulness. Most of them did not intentionally being unfaithful but they didn't set boundaries or hedges at the first place either.

On the book: Hedges Jerry Jenkins wrote about the importance of setting boundaries to protect our marriage. He described six hedges he has planted in his life as example but suggest that each individual to set and follow hedges appropriate to his or her situation.

1. When he meets, dines or travels with an unrelated woman, he always adds a third person to the group. When this is impossible, he is always the first to tell his wife.
2. He is careful about touching women. He embraces only relatives or close friends, and only in the company of others.
3. If he pays a woman a compliment, it is on clothes or hair, not the woman herself.
4. He avoids flirtation and suggestive conversations, even in jest.
5. He often reminds himself and his wife that he remembers their wedding vows.
6. From the time he gets home to the time the children go to bed, he does no work in order that he might spend quality time with the family.
7. He also promotes the importance of a man sharing his story - the story of how he and his wife met and fell in love. These stories are a powerful reminder of the love a man and wife share and it is important that these stories become a part of the family's heritage.

Rick Warren, also made similar boundaries called Saddleback Staff Ten Commandments, which are:

1. Thou shalt not go to lunch alone with the opposite sex. *
2. Thou shalt not have the opposite sex pick you up or drive you places when it is just the two of you.*
3. Thou shalt not kiss any attender of the opposite sex or show affection that could be questioned.*
4. Thou shalt not visit the opposite sex alone at home. *
5. Thou shalt not counsel the opposite sex alone at the office, and thou shalt not counsel the opposite sex more than once without that person’s mate. Refer them.
6. Thou shalt not discuss detailed sexual problems with the opposite sex in counseling. Refer them.
7. Thou shalt not discuss your marriage problems with an attender of the opposite sex.
8. Thou shalt be careful in answering emails, instant messages, chat rooms, cards or letters from the opposite sex.
9. Thou shalt make your co-worker your protective ally.
10. Thou shalt pray for the integrity of other staff members.

  * The first four do not apply to unmarried staff.

Realizing how weak we are and how so many have fallen into temptation even those whom we know are spiritually stronger and more mature than us; Chris and I adopt most of the above guidelines.  I remember sharing these to a friend and she commented that some of those may not be applicable in certain work setting that require one on one meeting and such. I told her they are not law but guidelines. What important is for us to be mindful, prayerful, and creative.

  Other things Chris and I do to protect our marriage:
1. Wear our wedding bands always. We purposely chose simple rings that way we don't have to worry about them getting dirty or attract unwanted attention.

2. Share passwords: E-mail, Facebook, Evernote, and so on.  It's not something that we think every couple should do. We didn't do it at the beginning of our marriage but we do now for communication and practical purposes. For instance if I don't have internet access and I need certain documents, I can just call Chris and he can access the document for me. Recently we set up One Password for security purpose.

3. Keep phone call with opposite sex short and to the point. There was a time when I was on the phone for a long time with a minister. He called me to talk about a ministry I was involved in. He did most of the talking. Because he was a minister I feel it is not polite if I don't listen, right? I told Chris about it and told him how both the phone and my ear were hot because I was listening to the minister talking for hours. He wasn't happy about it so the next time the person called I told him it's better if he talk to my husband. Guess what? He still talked for hours even though all Chris said was, "I see... uh huh... uh huh....uh huh...." :)) Well...at least I don't have to be the one who listened to him. Lesson learned: Let your spouse be your guard. :)

4. Whenever we e-mail someone of opposite sex, we usually include each other e-mail and sign as "us" or our family.

5. I recently when through my friend list on Facebook and un-friend some guys whom on the past may have interest with me or the other way around. Do they know? Maybe... What if they get offended? That's okay because I believe it was a wise thing to do for my marriage.

6. Credit my spouse whenever someone of opposite sex compliments my body or look. Some people are by nature like to comment and they don't mean to be flirty but some people do. I once brought my two-year-old out and about still a guy would asked,"Is he yours? You looks too young to have a baby and you looks great bla... bla... bla...." I replied, "Thank you! That's because I have a great husband who take a good care of me." then I walked away.

7. We keep each other accountable and most of our closest friends know our standards and won't hesitate to remind us whenever we need a reminder.

8. Flirt with each other often - okay this one maybe for another post ;)

Anyway, that's all I want to share. Feel free to comment if you have anything else to add.


Note: Some links in this post are my referral links

A Life Well Lived

image source

My head is still spinning from too much crying and laughing at the same time. We just came back from a beautiful memorial service while our loving neighbors kindly watched the boys. I think their head might be spinning too from too much noisy and energy that my kids brought. Sorry guys and thank you so much! 

We met Liza and her husband 10 years ago in a ministry to refugee youths. We spent time praying, talking, and eating at their house, which was nothing fancy but full of memories, love, and laughter. At that time her third child was about to graduate from high school and she was about to return to work as nurse after being a stay at home mom to her 3 kids while they were growing up. I remember her always smiling, loving, and serving. Her loves to people is soooo obvious. She also loves to pray and sing.  

We only met a few more times before she passed away but the loving legacy she left will forever be remembered. Below are some sweet memories and lessons that her close families and friends share today at the memorial service, which is very touching and beautiful, which made us laugh and cry at the same time.

Liza was the first Christian in her family and she was the one who led her belated mother and her youngest sister to Christ. She was also the first victim of breast cancer in the family. The rest of the sisters look high on her for she had survived cancer for more than two decades before she got relapsed in last August. Because of her faith, other three sisters and most of their children are now believers in Jesus. 

In Wednesday night, after nine months painful battle with cancer, Liza passed peacefully from this life into the presence of the Lord. Her health declined quickly in her final weeks, but they were blessed to spend Mother's Day at home together the day before she was hospitalized, and then to gather as a family around her in the hospital to pray and tell her good-byes. 

The daughter shared a testimony about her, a story that she said she would tell her children again and again,

"My mom is a a learner, free spirited, a simple women. She is a strict mother, resilient, delighted in people, and faithful to the end."

My mom was a remarkable woman, the first Christian in her family, and the daughter of immigrants from China to Malaysia who made her way to the United States. My mom loved deeply, prayed fervently, served faithfully, lived simply, and when it came to Tetris, Scrabble and Mah Jong, she played to win (and often did)."

Her son shared, "One thing that I will miss is her cooking. Over the years, she has develop her own Chinese-Malaysian-American cooking such as serving tomatoes sauce meatballs over rice; cooking fried rice with corn and ham, and such. Growing up, she always cook for us, breakfast, packed lunch, and dinner. Looking back, I'm very thankful that she chose to put on hold her career as nurse to nurture us. She made us a home. While my dad is the head of the home, my mom is the heart of our home." He then thank his dad for being a role model and faithful caregiver to her mom at her last days on earth.

Her husband shared at the end thanking and praising her as well. All her three kids grow up loving and serving God. After hearing the sharing from her close friends and family; I can't help but being reminded of the Proverbs 31: 

v.10 A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies.
v.11 Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value.
v.12 She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life.
v.13 She selects wool and flax and works with eager hands.
v.14 She is like the merchant ships, bringing her food from afar.
v.15 She gets up while it is still dark; she provides food for her family and portions for her servant girls.
v.16 She considers a field and buys it; out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.
v.17 She sets about her work vigorously; her arms are strong for her tasks.
v.18 She sees that her trading is profitable, and her lamp does not go out at night.
v.19 In her hand she holds the distaff and grasps the spindle with her fingers.
v.20 She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy.
v.21 When it snows, she has no fear for her household; for all of them are clothed in scarlet.
v.22 She makes coverings for her bed; she is clothed in fine linen and purple.
v.23 Her husband is respected at the city gate, where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.
v.24 She makes linen garments and sells them, and supplies the merchants with sashes.
v.25 She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come.
v.26 She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue.
v.27 She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness.
v.28 Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her:
v.29 "Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all."
v.30 Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.
v.31 Give her the reward she has earned, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.

Thank you Liza for loving, caring, and being such a sweet blessing and inspiration to many, especially to me. I will see you in Heaven one day.